England and the Netherlands played out an entertaining game in the UEFA Nations League semi final on Thursday, with mistakes, skill and VAR all playing their part, until John Stones and Ross Barkley's defensive disasters stole the show!
A penalty from Marcus Rashford had handed Gareth Southgate's side the lead in the first half after a poor challenge from Matthijs de Ligt, before the defender rallied to bring his team back level in the second period with a powerful header.
Naturally, this meant his transfer value was as volatile as cryptocurrency, it seemed.
De Ligt transfer value changes tonight (starting at €80m).— Troll Football (@TrollFootball) June 6, 2019
9:16pm: Gives penalty to England - €50m
9:24pm: Nutmegged by Sancho - €20m
10:19pm: Scores Goal - €80m
But De Ligt's equaliser was quickly followed by some DeLigtful/liquid/total football from the Three Lions, ending in one of the great team goals in English football history, some have speculated.
The only catch? It didn't count, with VAR ruling it out because Jesse Lingard's left shoelace was supposedly offside.
That was the best goal England have scored in this millennium. And it was disallowed.— Ryan Bailey (@RyanJayBailey) June 6, 2019
England playing some Sarriball there!— Liam Twomey (@liam_twomey) June 6, 2019
This meant that extra time beckoned, which itself beckoned some, let's say, less than savoury memories for England fans.
And, perhaps expectedly, this came to pass when John Stones went full John Stones, attempting a needless pirouette only to solemnly fall on his backside, with Jordan Pickford bailing him out with a first save but unable to halt the second shot, courtesy of a trailing leg from Kyle Walker.
Obviously, this complete shambles went down well...
Chris Smalling > John Stones.— Josh (@ManUnitedMedia) June 6, 2019
Holland win the John Stones feint trophy— Duncan Alexander (@oilysailor) June 6, 2019
John Stones is Everton , even if he’s at city he’s still Everton— Y (@YSAB87) June 6, 2019
Tyrone Mings is better than John Stones in the air and on the ball. Pass it on. #avfc— Villa Views (@VillaViews_) June 6, 2019
Who would you rather have playing at CB for England?— John Field (@johnfield1989) June 6, 2019
John Stones or A Pile of Stones pic.twitter.com/Vrg4c6Ygg7
But that wasn't all, no sir-ee. For Ross Barkley was yet to show his personal favourite magic trick, after Stones gave him a pass every amateur baller has dreamed of receiving in your own penalty box in extra time of an international semi final.
Dutch fans singing 'Always look on the bright side of life' after going 3-1 up. It came from another poor ball out of defence from John Stones, which Barkley struggled to deal with ...and Quincy Promes put away for his second— Sean Ingle (@seaningle) June 6, 2019
In fact, the only joke left at England's expense was, well, you know what...
We now go live to Brexit— Jonathan Liew (@jonathanliew) June 6, 2019